Today my mind dwells on the plight of the cross, the fall of man and life thereafter. I hear many believers beg to be restored to the garden. They cry—, “Holy was the garden! Restore me back before the clothes were on and the Lord was gone! Take us back!”

 

There is a puzzling in my spirit. Although life in the garden was perfect, my heart does not long to go back to it. I do not pray that the curse of Adam and the clothes that bind me would fall from my hips, relieving me of the burden cast by sin. Frankly, I didn’t see the point, but I am now beginning to.

 

People so often beg to return to the garden, because, in their understanding, the garden is a place devoid of shame and sin — a place where they could simply walk with the Lord in the cool of the day and enjoy His presence, unhindered and unabated.

 

I understand the longing for a purity that cannot dwell in a world ruled by sin. I understand a hunger for the real and tangible body of the Lord, walking with you, talking with you, being with you, touching you.

 

I understand, but my heart still does not cry for Eden.

 

I look at the garden and see that there was no need for Jesus. In the realm of the Eden, life was eternal and eternally outside of sin. When Adam and Eve were cast out of the garden, Father God had a conversation with the Son and the Spirit, saying, “ […] he must not be allowed to stretch out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat and live forever.”, which shows us that Adam and Eve were intended to live forever in that place.

 

Adam and Eve lived in the idealistic version of the world— it almost seems unrealistic in concept. Their food was laid before them. The water source continuously and eternally flowed. They were fully taken care of and fully accepted for who they were.

 

They were naked yet unafraid— because they were naked before the Lord. They bore no shame nor any clothings that would hide who they were or what they thought from the Lord. In God’s original plan, vulnerability didn’t exist because vulnerability implies that exposition has to happen— and with no coverings to hide everything, there could be no exposing of anything.

 

While I understand the pull towards a life lived free of the grip of the enemy, I still do not long for it.

 

While the promise of their eternity looks as though it comes at the cost of mine, I would not revoke the cross for what it brought me: an intimate and personable relationship with Jesus and the Holy Spirit. For to trade in the struggle of shame is to trade in a Savior who bore my shame so that I could live free of it.

 

 Adam and Eve walked with God, but through their curse and Jesus’s cross, I get to walk with the three-part God head— Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. Even if I live a life more difficult, I live a fuller life.

 

I am grateful for the fall and for what it gave me. Although I do not long for the death of my Savior, through His life, which He voluntarily gave for death, I now have active communion with a three-part God instead of walks in the garden with a one.

 

Adam and Eve traded curiosity for their place in the garden, and thousands of years later, Jesus traded in his life for death, all so that now I could trade in my curse for freedom.

 

Because of what I have received in the beautiful exchange, I do not resent the burden of sin.

 

Adam and Eve prove to us that you do not have to have sinful circumstances surrounding your birth to have sinful circumstance attack your life. They prove to us that the enemy will act inside of promise as much as he acts outside of Eden.

 

Adam and Eve weren’t raised in a broken home or by unconcerned parents. They never experienced rape or abuse or neglect. They lacked for not, yet the siren song of sin still serenaded their hearts.

 

Where they would have been left in an eternity of choosing not to choose the fruit that tempted them, through Christ, I am gifted an eternity where I choose once the name of Jesus and am rewarded from the pull of sin for eternity.

 

Adam and Eve lived in a garden with a tree that could always be used against them, and while I live in a world where temptation runs rampant and there is always an opportunity to sin, I also live in a world that is cleansed by the blood of Jesus. That cleansing is enough to pay for any mistake I might make or any fruit I might pull off of a metaphorical tree.

 

It seems contradictory to human nature to choose a path deliberately more difficult; yet to me, I find great joy in my loss— for in it, I am reminded of the price that was paid on the cross to promise that it would one day be restored to me, in full, with excess.

 

I believe that in our pain, we so often take for granted the circumstances that brought about our pain. Paul infamously tells us to “count it all joy”  and to “rejoice in our sufferings”, but to most, his words resound like mockery in our broken hearts.

 

To rejoice in times of great promise and great overflow and great surplus seems customary enough. God warrants our praise because He has given to us.

    

But to worship in moments of depravity? To give praise in times of loss?

 

Why would we worship at the loss of our child or our spouse or our job or our home? What warrants our praise when depression rules in our lives and anxiety is all consuming?

 

How are we to be grateful for the fall of man that led to the dissolution of our families?

 

I understand suffering to be a gift of Jesus. Provision marked the garden but promise marks the cross.

 

Where Adam once had abundantly, I now have exceedingly and abundantly.

 

I have an excess because of Jesus. I traded my sorrows and my woes, relinquishing them with rejoicing, to receive back all that I had lost and more. For when we suffer and struggle from the fall of man, we find the true and earnest love of God through Christ Jesus.

 

When we sin— the love of God holds us and forgives us. When we are tempted— the love of God fortifies us and encourages us. When we suffer… when our homes are ripped from us and our families are stolen from our grasp— the love of God overwhelms us by reminding us of the cross.

 

If God could love you enough to give His Son to be crucified, how much more does He love to turn what the enemy meant for evil in your life into something beautiful?

 

We became an investment two thousand years ago. The Father invested an entire life: the entire human life of His Son, so that we could live. Father God, Abba Father, has a lot at stake when it comes to our lives succumbing to the evils of this world.

 

He fights for us because He paid for us. He paid for us because He sees the value in us. He sees the value in us because He created us. And because He created us, I choose to live in His creation as is, without longing to return to the beauty of the past, but rather, choosing to believe in the promise of extravagance in the present.

 

Still, there are times that I clutch my heart in sorrow. I look at the life that I have lived: a life defined by loss, abuse, and adversity. Yet, although I see a life once claimed by satan, I also see a life now reclaimed by the blood of the Lamb— a life defined by renewal and indicative of redemption unending. That alone transforms my sadness into great joy.

 

I suffered, but what was taken has been returned tenfold. If I could abandon my hurt to return to an Eden before the fall, I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t trade my sufferings and unfulfilled yearnings, because in them, I found a Savior, a Spirit, and a love that more than made up for them all.

 

Through the cross, my days of harvest far outnumber my days of labor— and for that, I am eternally grateful. All of you have experienced the sorrows that stemmed from the circumstances of the fall. But all of you also can break the curse of Adam and choose to move forward in the promise of the present.

 

Gone are the days that you long for the immaculate garden, and here are the days that you rejoice in receiving all of the Godhead, all of the time.

 

Brothers, sisters— let your life be marked by grand delight, for all that Eden could hold still falls short of the open heaven that is being offered to you right now.

 

In both places, here and there, through Jesus, shame does not have a place. But in only one place, here, now, with Jesus, are we given an excess to what we had in the garden.

 

Choose excess. Choose the present. Choose promise. We believe in you.