To the one branded in shame: to the one that has been recklessly cast as a failed mother, here is My heart for you:

 

You are not a failure.

 

You are not a bad mother.

 

Period.

 

I shall continue on, but in your hurriedness and in the seeming-endless list of things that you have to do today, that is what I want you to know.

 

You have not failed your children.

 

You have not failed your children and you have not failed Me.

 

You were told that you were too young to have children.  People said that you didn’t have the money or the time or resources to raise them “right”.  They criticized the way that you chose to have children.

 

Out of wedlock, they called you a sinner and a shame.

 

Inside of marriage, they called you immature and unprepared.

 

You were either told that you didn’t wait long enough to have children or that you waited too long.

 

No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t seem to do anything right.

 

You wanted to breastfeed and people said that you weren’t strong enough or capable enough to last.  You wanted to use formula and people chastised you not giving your child “what was best”.

 

You decided to spank and people accused you of abusing your children, while if you would have opted not to, they would accuse you of not discipling them.

 

From day one, it seemed like people were against you and your decisions as a mother, but I never have been.

 

I put that child in your womb.

 

I didn’t care whether you stayed home or put your child in daycare.  I didn’t care whether you breastfed or bottle-fed.  I didn’t care whether they went to public or private school.

 

I cared about them being loved, and that was something that you were more than capable of doing.

 

The world has made your motherhood about the decisions that you make, while I consider the earnest mark of motherhood to be about the love that you give.

 

And you, sweet mother of My beloved children, have loved well.

 

You are not a bad mother.

 

I feel your heart contract as I speak those words over you.

 

“But I could have done this instead,” it cries.  “I should have said this,” it laments.

 

Your heart is deceitful, above all things.  It is not a righteous judge of character.  I, however, am.

 

Where your heart judges you harshly, I speak soothing words of encouragement and grace.

 

Where the world criticizes and chastises, I choose to celebrate the choices that you made that have led to life.

 

You can’t do it right all of the time, but you don’t have to when there’s grace.

 

I want you to grow.  I want you to be in constant pursuit of what is right and what is righteous.  I want you to be the best mother that you can be, but that doesn’t require your perfection: it requires mine.

 

I am perfect so that you don’t have to be.

 

In grace, making mistakes doesn’t make you a mistake— it makes you an overcomer.

 

Because you are imperfect, you are bound to make decisions that are imperfect.

 

But because I am perfect, my decision to make you their mother is perfect.

 

People have called you unqualified, incapable— a downright failure and inept at doing the one thing that you were born to do.

 

But they didn’t make you a mother— I did.

 

I don’t make pots incapable of holding water, nor do I make people incapable of holding positions.

 

I didn’t make you a mother only for you to be an incompetent one.

 

I didn’t make you a mother only for you to fail at being a mother.

 

I made you a mother, because I was sure that you would excel at it.

 

I made you a mother because I knew that you would do exactly what you were made to do.

 

I am sorry that the world has thrown shame and guilt into what is, truly, the most beautiful and worthy job that you could have.  I am sorry that the world has measured you against others in an attempt to shame you into their way of thinking or acting.  I am sorry that the honor of your position has been stripped from you.

 

Not only are you not a bad mother, but you are not just a mother.

 

You are not just a mom, you are so much more.

 

You are a vessel created to carry life and light.  From you, life continues on.  You birth hope, joy, and the future to come.  I didn’t form you to bow to the world— I formed you to bring the Kingdom to it.

 

The world has limited the phrase “mother” to those who have birthed a child into the world, but it cuts away so much and limits the possibilities that I had in mind at creation.

 

If your child is alive and well— you are a mother.

 

If your child has passed— you are a mother.

 

If your child never made it into this world, for whatever reason— you are a mother.

 

If you have adopted a child as your own— you are a mother.

 

If you were never able or never chose to have children, but you have brought life into a job or a ministry or into a family, however unconventional— you are a mother.

 

Being a mother is about so much more than choices about discipline and schooling and vaccines— it’s even more than just birthing a child— it’s about bringing life into the world, and you, My dear, have brought life into this world.

 

The world doesn’t have the authority to disqualify your motherhood, only I do.  I am the only One who can disqualify your motherhood, and please know that I never will.

 

I do not label motherhood as the world does.

 

I do not criticize your merits as the world does.

 

I do not give and take away your title as the world does.

 

I created women, uniquely, to be bringers of life, both in the tangible and intangible sense, to bring life and restoration to this broken and dying world.

 

When you wake up and choose to speak kindly to your neighbor, you become a mother to kindness, bringing my light into this world.

 

When you choose to deliver honesty and transparency in your affections, you become a mother to the affections of heaven, bringing truth and vulnerability to this world.

 

When you choose to bring life into this world, you become a mother and dear, you are a good mother in more ways than one.

 

I say this not to disqualify the miracle of child-birth that requires time and thought and energy, but to disqualify the world’s disqualifying remarks about your motherhood.

 

The world has so many qualifications that it demands you meet before you receive its approval.

 

I don’t.

 

You have two wombs: one in your body and one in your spirit, and both are unique and important.

 

Please, sweet love of Mine, do not think that your child of spirit is less important than your child of body.  Both are unique and beautiful and meant to live in eternity.

 

No matter where your child is in life or where they are in the eternal, they are still a child loved by you and loved by Me— and that is enough.

 

You are a good mom.  You are good because I made you good, not because you made you good.

 

Because I have gifted you the title, no one can take it away.

 

Not even you.

 

Even when you falter, even when you fall, I still recognize you as a good mother.

 

A good mother is one that loves her child.

 

And you, My greatest love, have loved your child well.

 

You are not a failure.  You are not a bad mother.  You are working and toiling and striving to figure out the best way to love the life that you have named and brought in to this world, and that is enough.

 

You are enough.